Top Gun

Why do gay people at Mardi Gras walk around half dressed (naked)?
" Not racist question just curious"

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Bye Bye Baby!

antichrist

with the female impersonators it is to advertise what they have not got

fatty owls

they is poor peeps n dont has da money to by all da clothez.

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RETARD WARS - harness your ignorance with the help of alex jones !!

Igor Goldenberg

A sad testament to our PC time when you feel the need to include a disclaimer for perfectly normal question.

__________________
For private coaching email IgorGoldenberg@bluebottle.com
Computer tells you what to play, a good coach explains why.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.
H. L. Mencken

antichrist

Exactly, especially when one has to include a disclaimer that they are not anti-Semitic when they are just being anti-racist, anti-genocidal, anti-robber about Israel.

fatty owls

even if da disclaymas was needin its da wrong disclaymas since da ishoos is da sekshal one not da efnisitees one. all da efnisitees has da gayz peeps !!

eetha wayz it not bordring on raysizmz.

peace out, fo real !!

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RETARD WARS - harness your ignorance with the help of alex jones !!

Iconoclast

Now nominated for "Post of the Month."

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The individual is hopeless without the group.
The group is hopeless without its individuals.

Just2Good

In Anti-Christ's case, given he has made remarks about Victorian Aboriginals in the past, the disclaimer is probably a good idea.

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.
"The fox knows many things, but the hedgehog knows one big thing."

~ Isaiah Berlin ~

antichrist

As well I made comments on Australia Day that the whites should be bred out of Australia so the country could be given back to the Aborigines - talk about upsetting the white natives, as well no disclaimer given nor prejudice abandoned

antichrist

A man goes to the Doctor with major constipation.

The Doctor says "I can help you with that but it is going to require a suppository, I will have to give you one now and if you can get your partner to give you one tomorrow you should be fine".

The man agrees and bends over while the Doctor inserts the first suppository, after which the man gets dressed and heads home.

The next day he turns to his wife and says "the Doctor gave me a suppository for my constipation but I can't put it up there myself, would you mind?"

The wife agrees, and gets her husband to bend over, puts one hand on his shoulder but before she could finish inserting the suppository he screams.

She quickly pulls her hand away and says " what's wrong, what's wrong, did I hurt you? "

The man shakes his head and says " no I just realized the Doctor had both his hands on my shoulders....."

Igor Goldenberg

In AC case any disclaimer is irrelevant to the post. Actually, in AC case any post is irrelevant.

__________________
For private coaching email IgorGoldenberg@bluebottle.com
Computer tells you what to play, a good coach explains why.

The urge to save humanity is almost always a false front for the urge to rule.
H. L. Mencken

antichrist

Subject: European Terrorist Threat Levels by John Cleese



ALERTS TO THREATS, IN 2011 EUROPE....... BY JOHN CLEESE

The English are feeling the pinch in relation to recent terrorist threats and
have therefore raised their security level from "Miffed" to "Peeved." Soon,
though, security levels may be raised yet again to "Irritated" or even "A Bit
Cross." The English have not been "A Bit Cross" since the blitz in 1940 when
tea supplies nearly ran out. Terrorists have been re-categorized from
"Tiresome" to "A Bloody Nuisance." The last time the British issued a "Bloody
Nuisance" warning level was in 1588, when threatened by the Spanish Armada.


The Scots have raised their threat level from "Pissed Off" to "Let's get the
Bastards." They don't have any other levels. This is the reason they have been
used on the front line of the British army for the last 300 years.


The French government announced yesterday that it has raised its terror alert
level from "Run" to "Hide." The only two higher levels in France are
"Collaborate" and "Surrender." The rise was precipitated by a recent fire that
destroyed France 's white flag factory, effectively paralyzing the country's
military capability.


Italy has increased the alert level from "Shout Loudly and Excitedly" to
"Elaborate Military Posturing." Two more levels remain: "Ineffective Combat
Operations" and "Change Sides."


The Germans have increased their alert state from "Disdainful Arrogance" to
"Dress in Uniform and Sing Marching Songs." They also have two higher levels:
"Invade a Neighbor" and "Lose."


Belgians, on the other hand, are all on holiday as usual; the only threat they
are worried about is NATO pulling out of Brussels .


The Spanish are all excited to see their new submarines ready to deploy. These
beautifully designed subs have glass bottoms so the new Spanish navy can get a
really good look at the old Spanish navy.


Australia , meanwhile, has raised its security level from "No worries" to
"She'll be alright, Mate." Two more escalation levels remain: "Crikey! I think
we'll need to cancel the barbie this weekend!" and "The barbie is canceled." So
far no situation has ever warranted use of the final escalation level.


-- John Cleese - British writer, actor and tall person

antichrist

HOW TO START A FIGHT












One year, I decided to buy my mother-in-law a cemetery plot as a Christmas gift .... The next year, I didn't buy her a gift. When she asked me why, I replied, "Well, you still haven't used the gift I bought you last year!"


And that's how the fight started ...

________________________________


My wife and I were watching Who Wants To Be A Millionaire while we were in bed. I turned to her and said, 'Do you want to have Sex?'
'No,' she answered.


I then said, 'Is that your final answer?'
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying, 'Yes..'
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."

And that's when the fight started ...

________________________________


I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.
"I'll have the rump steak, rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?"
"Nah, she can order for herself."

And that's when the fight started ...

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My wife and I were sitting at a table at her high school reunion, and she kept staring at a drunken man swigging his drink as he sat alone at a nearby table.
I asked her, "Do you know him?"
"Yes", she sighed, "He's my old boyfriend. I understand he took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear he hasn't been sober since."
"My God!" I said, "Who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?"

And then the fight started

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When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wife kept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first, the shed, the boat, making beer. Always something more important to me. Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tall grass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a minute, and when I came out again I handed her a toothbrush. I said, "When you finish cutting the grass, you might as well sweep the driveway."
The doctors say I will walk again, but I will always have a limp.

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My wife sat down next to me as I was flipping channels.
She asked, "What's on TV?"
I said, "Dust."


And then the fight started ...

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Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential downpour. The wind was blowing 50mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day. I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back; now with a different anticipation, and whispered, "The weather out there is terrible."
My loving wife of 5 years replied, "And, can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?"

And that's how the fight started ...

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My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary.

She said, "I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds."

I bought her a bathroom scale.

And then the fight started ...

________________________________


My wife was standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror.
She was not happy with what she saw and said to me, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
I replied, "Your eyesight's damn near perfect."

And then the fight started ...

________________________________


I rear-ended a car this morning .... the start of a REALLY bad day!
The driver got out of the other car, and he was a DWARF!!
He looked up at me and said 'I am NOT Happy!'
So I said, 'Well, which one ARE you then?'

That's how the fight started ...

antichrist

There was a young vampire called Mable,
whose periods were always quite stable,
at every full moon,
she took out a spoon,
and drank herself under the table.

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antichrist

An Irishman was walking home late at night and sees a woman lurking in the shadows.



"How about you do it wid me for 'Twenty quid?" she whispers.



Paddy had never had a hooker before, but decides -- what the hell, it's only twenty quid, and it's been the same old wife, whenever!!.So they go into the bushes and get on with it.



They're going at it for a couple of minutes when, all of a sudden, a light flashes on them. It's a police officer.



"Oye'ya, What's going on here, people?" asks the officer.



"I'm making love to me wife," the Irishman answers sounding very annoyed.



"Oh, I'm so sorry," says the cop, "I didn't know it was your wife!!"



"Well, needer did I," says Paddy, "til ya shoined dat light o' yers in her bluddy face!!!"